Smile Worthy Conversations

Princess Leia: Those shorts are a little short-I can see your ass cheeks, especially when you stick your butt out.
CocaKoler: Wait! Are you wearing underwear?

CocaKoler: The names for female body parts are so pretty. If I didn’t know what “Vagina” meant I’d totally name my daughter that.

(CherBear shows off her bum bum)
CocaKoler: Can I tap that?
CherBear: Uh….no, but you can touch it.
(five minutes later)
CocaKoler: Wait, does “tap that” mean something besides tapping it with my hand? (brief pause followed by awkward silence and then hysterical laughter) oh….hahaha….never mind.

CocaKoler: He’s a pretty popular midget.
Me: No, he’s a dwarf, (points to itty bitty) she’s a midget.
Itty Bitty: Did you just point to me?
Me: Yes. (laughs)
Itty Bitty: Hey!! (Squats a little lower and then in a slightly higher octave) Hey!!

Baird Lennion or Lars B: I hate being the only guy there that doesn’t know a song.
Princess Leia: I didn’t know it.
Baird Lennion or Lars B: Yeah, but you’re not a man.
Princess Leia: Right.
Me: And soon I won’t be.
Princess Leia: Right.
(Awkward silence)
Princess Leia: I don’t think Lars gets the joke.
Me: Just a little transgender joke….no, don’t worry Lars-I’m all woman.
Princess Leia: I’m pretty sure he was worried about that.
Me: Well you never know-I don’t want any rumors started.
Princess Leia: Yeah, Lars is really into starting rumors about people.
Me: (Lars impression) “Hey everyone, guess what I just heard? Sarah used to be a man!”….No, I don’t think people would believe it anyway.
Baird Lennion or Lars B: Yeah, I wouldn’t buy it.