Thursday, July 02, 2009

In a Funk

I’ve been in kind of a funk for the past week, getting rear ended and having my grandmother die (heartbreaking and am still in shock) all in the span of a couple hours hasn’t helped, but those aren’t the only reasons I feel out of wack. I think it started last Friday at girl’s night after watching “He’s Just Not That Into You”. Thank you Renae and Cherilyn for a lovely evening, but that movie might have screwed me up for life and if I vent about it then it just might make me feel better (at least in that regard). So here I go.

What I learned from the movie (at face value):
If you’re interested in a guy and you don’t look like a supermodel, he’s not interested. No matter how pretty, thin or clever you may be. Or how amazing your legs or breasts are. Or what a marvelous personality you may have. Even if he talks, flirts and pays particular attention to you, or gets your phone number (by any means necessary)-he’s not interested in you.

You will never be the exception-take everything a guy does at face value. No cryptic message decoding needed, what he says is what he means-don’t read into things!

You don’t intimidate him, if he wanted to date you, he would.

Men are douchebags.

Oh and if you have a figure (cough, cough…breasts) or would be described as “sexy”, you are an evil whore and will end up with no one. On the bright side, all the men will want you-not to date or marry you though, so there’s a downside.

What I learned from the movie (looking deeper):
Everyone is an exception to someone. You may be reading into things (generally speaking), but to the one that matters, you’re not. And although you have to go through a lot of crap along the way, it’s worth it. So keep overanalyzing things with your girlfriends until your head explodes because someday, you’ll be right!

Men are lazy.

Men are douchebags.

What I’ve been told (from the horse’s mouth, so it’s legit) by men:
I intimidate men (generally speaking, not all). As much as people would like to tell you that this is not a reason guys act the way the do, in some girl’s cases, it is. Men are intimidated by beautiful, confident women that don’t need a man. Even though I do like attention from guys (what girl doesn’t?), I don’t need it to have a good time. Whether or not I’m enjoying myself and my life is completely dependent upon, well, me. That intimidates men.

If you have a strong relationship with your girlfriends (a la the trifecta – Leah, Bridgette, and me) it deters guys from asking out someone from the group, because if you piss off one girl, you’ve pissed off them all. Also it’s difficult for guys to tell which in the group likes or would be interested in him and if he chooses incorrectly, well you can imagine. So a lot of guys just don’t try.

Security in my attractiveness (e.g. you’re a fox, you’re gorgeous, I like watching you dance, you can shake it like no other, etc.)

Men are douchebags.

What I’ve gleaned from my own experiences:
It doesn’t really have anything to do with whether or not a guy is interested (in my experience most guys would be interested if they knew you were) and if you think he is, there's a good possibility he is. It comes down to if he’s going to do anything about it or not (if he has enough balls or isn’t too lazy that is), which usually isn’t very often. Because like everyone else, guys have insecurities too and they get nervous just like you. To say they don’t is stupid. It’s like saying they are void of emotion. I’ve made my fair share of men cry (all warranted) and to say that is just not true. Women are capable of hurting men just as much (if not more) than the reverse.

And if a guy doesn’t try to pursue me then it’s his loss. Not mine. Because I’m marvelous!

Also, men are douchebags.

The End.
Thank you for listening (or reading), now I feel better.

2 comments:

Leah said...

So true!! Don't let the movie scar you!!

(Men are douchbags!)

Ivy said...

So, I will tell you what I learned from the movie (which was not a whole lot)...hollywood does not know a THING about relationships. I will give them credit and agree that women should recognize some warning signs that they are getting from guys, but past that I found the movie offensive and sad!